NOT ON REX MANNING DAY!

HERPADERPISTAN!

Since I don’t think I’ve made one since I signed up, this 5000th post is a big fancy “About Me”, an effort that will probably go to waste.

My name is Breanna May and I am an extroverted, introverted semi-loner who was born 23 years and 9 months ago in Gawler, South Australia. Gawler used to be a delightful country town, but it’s gradually becoming just another, overpopulated suburb of Adelaide.

I learned of Tumblr through Mel and Kim (not the 80’s pop duo … OR ARE THEY) and I signed up because I desperately needed an outlet for my mind. I’ve now been with Tumblr for 1 year, 6 months and 2 days and what I’ve found is this community of incredibly kind, intelligent and witty people who think how I think and like what I like and teach me so much.

Now for some useless facts about myself:

• My middle name is May and I was born in May but this is only half a coincidence because I was named after my mum’s aunt.
• My first name is traditionally spelt “Brianna” but my parents chose “Breanna” because a) it’s awesome, and b) it’s more “meaningful” to them as it is a mixture of Brenton (my dad), Leanne (my auntie) and Ann (my mum’s middle name). This is also only half a coincidence. I think they just came up with that after they decided they liked the look of “Breanna” better.
• I have an older sister who is 26, a younger sister who is 21 and a younger brother who is 12.
• I am 5’1” and 4/5. I stopped growing when I was about 12.
• I’m plump and lumpy. I intend on staying at least a little plump but not as plump as I am now because I have a few health issues that need sorting out. When I say a few, I mean 13,682,975.
• I am left handed when writing and drawing, ambidextrous when painting or eating with cutlery and right handed for everything else.
• I’m rarely serious. The only things I actually take seriously in life are the rights of all creatures, racism, homophobia, sexism … you get the drift.
• Although I live for bare feet, I sincerely adore shoes. 
• I have always lacked concentration and organisational skills.
• I am a terrible liar but I also feel I’m terrible at telling the truth. My truths aren’t very convincing to some people.
• I am generally great with instinctive orientation and navigation but have a lot of trouble when there are people in the car with me, leading them to believe I am hopeless.
• The only part of my body that has never gained any fat is my calves. I have inherited my dad’s calves. Bitches be muscley as Mr. Universe.
• I’ve always felt like an outcast with the majority of my family.
• It takes up a lot of my physical and emotional energy to participate in most social situations. I can normally only handle a couple of hours before the anxiety comes to play.
• I love music, but don’t listen to much and never keep up with current artists. Movies more my thing. Not horror movies though. Horror movies just annoy me most of the time. Unless they’re really old. I can appreciate an original concept or a well portrayed adaptation though.
• I repeated reception because I was considered too “immature” for grade one.
• My completely expressionless face looks like I’m angry or disgusted by something. I mean no offence. It’s just my face.
• I strongly believe that laughter is one of the greatest experiences a human can have.
• I don’t work because of my awesome depression skills, but have wanted to be an actor since I can remember and I’ve decided that I’m finally going to start going for it this year.
• I’m terrible at hypotheticals. I always end up twisting them to suit me, thus making both the original hypothetical and my response redundant.
• I can’t cope with conflict and I try to keep at peace with all people. If somebody won’t allow this, I remove myself from the situation.
• Sometimes, I take photos.
• I never finished high school, nor do I intend to gain any tertiary education. Instead, I intend to follow my desires with natural skill and self gained experience, working at my own pace and not the pace that is forced upon us by the impatience of the rest of the world.
• I miss being a dancer.
• Someday I hope to work with endangered animals.
• I love raw vegetables and I’m constantly forgetting this.
• I have an enormous fear of European wasps. I know too much about their abilities and temperament to shoo them away like any other flying bug getting all up in mah bidness.
• Although I’ve been stung many times, I like bees. My poppy has been a beekeeper for as long as I’ve lived and I used to casually stroll through masses of them in his back yard to say hello to him while he was working in the shed.
• I upset myself when I kill bugs that won’t leave me alone.
• My nutrition is quite poor because, although nutritious foods are one of my greatest joys in life, I often forget to feed myself.
• I sleep naked and would love to live as a nudist. I was naked while writing this.
• I have a few different identities which come and go as they please.
• As much as I adore colour, I have a weakness for black and white photographs.
• I believe most stories about extra-terrestrials visiting Earth. Although I don’t believe that aliens are all mean people, Independence Day and War of the Worlds made me cry with fear. I couldn’t even pee alone after viewing.
• My favourite number is 8.
• My favourite colour is green.
• My favourite movie always comes down to Singin’ in the Rain.
• As difficult as it is to decide, my favourite existing animal is the elephant and my favourite extinct animal is the parasaurolophus.
• My favourite planet aside from the incredibly pretty Earth, is Jupiter.
• My favourite TV shows include Doctor Who, Arrested Development, Spongebob Squarepants and Misfits.
• My favourite flowers include Tulips, Daisies, Frangipanis, and Lilies.
• My favourite season is Autumn.
• My favourite band/musical artist chops and changes, but is most consistently Muse as I know more of their “catalogue” than I do any other artist.
• My favourite Thunderbird is Thunderbird 2.
• My favourite trees include the Weeping Willow, Jacaranda and Eucalyptus.
• My favourite nom is my mum’s vegetable lasagne. I believe I could live on it for the rest of my life.

So that’s a fragment of me, now everybody sing a delightful sea shanty!

WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA?!